Abuse encompasses far more than physical and sexual. Who's to say that one form of abuse is worse than the other. physical and sexual are horrendous. Verbal and emotional (manipulative) are horrible too. For the sake of this writing, we aren't going to compare and we are going to stick to verbal and emotional. There are many professionals, therapists, and help groups all around the world to help with abuse, all forms of abuse. If you feel you need to see professional help, don't hesitate.
The sad thing about emotional or verbal abuse is that the person who is on the receiving end of either, doesn't recognize it to be abuse. Many people to this day still think abuse only comes in the physical form. Not so. Here are a few things you should know if are being abused emotion ally or verbally.
1. A sharp tongue hurts as much as a slap across the face.
When someone is calling you names or belittling you, that pain will last forever. You will always hear those words and their voice in your head. That doesn't go away.
2. Self esteem is non existent.
For those who don't know, when you are being belittled on a daily basis, your self esteem becomes null and void. You feel worthless and stupid and people will take advantage of you because of that.
3. The others.
Other people will see that the behaviour you are being subjected to is one you have accepted and they will thing it is normal to treat you the same. Disrespect you, call you names, even if only in slight jest, they will do it as well.
4. Low enthusiasm or interest.
Whether it be work or chores, anyone who suffers abuse will not want to do anything with any kind of enthusiasm or care. They will care very little about doing things with anyone, even going out with friends.
5. A silent pain.
This is the hurt that sits inside and grows. No one see s it or even knows it's there except the abused. When you think someone is just being aloof or uninterested, it could very well be they are void of emotions and suffering in silent pain.
6. Start believing things.
When someone tells you time and time again that you are stupid, you eventually start to believe it. If they tell you you are ugly or fat or skinny or insult your physical appearance, you start to believe that too. Soon you will have little self value.
7. Just stay in or away.
When you get to the point that you believe you are ugly, stupid, fat and everything else your abuser has programmed into your mind, you will eventually just stop going out. You won't want to be seen in public for fear of saying something stupid and you won't want anyone to see you either because you are believed to be fat and ugly.
8. Such shame.
So much shame. It's hard to face family and friends and even co-workers. You know how you feel and you know your self esteem and worth is dangerously low. Because of this, you are pretty sure everyone around you can see this and for this, you are embarrassed and don't want to ever have to leave the house.
9. Stand up for you.
As much as you'd like to tell your abuser to stop or tell them off, it's hard to do that. You want them to stop or shut up but they are bigger than you, or so it seems, and staring down a bully is probably one of the hardest things ever to do. Trying to find courage to do this takes a long time and sadly, some never find it.
10. Be loving.
If you know of someone who is being emotionally or verbally abused (or abused in any way) just be loving and supportive. It's hard to understand what they are going through and harder to understand why they don't leave. Leaving is easier said than done most times. Just love them and be with them when they need someone. That's all you can do.
No one wants to talk about abuse and it's even less pleasant to know that a friend or family member is suffering from it and there is nothing you can do about it. Just being there for them is the best you can do and all they may need at the time.
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