I'm not fond of the word mistake. I think anything we did that might have not worked out the way we wanted to was simply a learning lesson. We tried something, it didn't work, we learned some new stuff about it and maybe we'll try again another day. No mistake there. Yet some people still call them mistakes, so be it.
In our lives we try many things, we lose jobs, we end relationships, we purchased things we shouldn't have and the end result is always the same. You call yourself stupid or dumb and you want to kick yourself in the arse for the mistake you just made. It's time to drop that thought and turn your frustrations into forgiveness. Getting the fact that it wasn't a mistake out of the way, here's why you need to forgive yourself.
1. You did the best you knew how.
No matter what the mistake was, you thought you knew best about it. You thought you were making a calculated decision based on your current knowledge of the situation. So it kinda flopped. That's ok. Dust off your arse, give yourself a pat on the back and say good job. If you don't forgive yourself right now you will always be leery of any decision you make in the future. Be confident.
2. Practice makes perfect.
You didn't make a mistake; you are merely practicing. Remind yourself that you aren't perfect and you don't know everything. That's how we learn. Try and try again. think of a baby learning to walk. Try and try again. It's necessary to forgive yourself immediately for whatever thing that didn't work out. If you don't you will never try anything new ever again. You will keep thinking that every time you try something new you will make a mistake. That's not so. Practice makes perfect.
3. A healthy self esteem is crucial to our wellbeing.
When we come from the mindset that we are always making mistakes and we are never good or smart enough to make decisions, this will eventually take its toll and play on our self worth, especially our self esteem. We won't have the confidence that we should have because we will always doubt ourselves. Forgive yourself now and know that you are doing better than most. At least you are trying.
4. Facing fears is important to our self confidence.
You made a mistake. You're upset. You swear you are never going to do that again, ever. Next time that same thing pops up you are terrified and back away. You must take whatever you did and flopped at, forgive yourself for feeling like a failure, because you aren't, and face that fear of whatever it was that is now holding you back. You deserve a life of adventure, change and joy and you won't experience any of that if fear is going to hold you back. Forgive and move on.
5. Because you really are smart and good enough.
When we make a mistake we immediately start blaming ourselves and calling ourselves names which does nothing for our self respect. You are smart and you are good enough and you know exactly what you are doing with what you have. Kudos to you. Forgive yourself and remind yourself that you are awesome and you are even more prepared now for the next time you try doing that thing again.
Always remember that not everything is going to go our way all the time and not everything is going to work out the way we want it to, including relationships or jobs or what have you. That's just part of life. Beating yourself up over it is damaging and you needn't do that. We are constantly learning and growing. Experiencing and trying new things. There are no mistakes. We do what we do because at the time it either feels right or we think we know what we're doing. Neither is wrong or a mistake. Go easy on yourself. You're doing the best you can with what you have. And that's pretty darned good.
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