It's Friday night and you are home alone again for the millionth weekend in a row while all your other friends are out with their partners or their new date. What on earth is the problem ? This pattern is becoming tiring and frustrating to say the least. You long to have a date, a partner a companion, something. What are you doing wrong or is there something wrong with you?
Yes, it's frustrating to be alone and single and you've just about given up all hope of ever meeting anyone. You're pretty sure you will be alone for the rest of your life now. Here's a small list of what the actual problems might be and maybe you can identify with some of them. this list is for those of us who don't want to be single anymore. We can't forget that there are people in this world who are single and love it! This list isn't for you.
1. You have a type. A type.
For the most part, this really does make sense. We are or aren't physically attracted to certain people for various reasons. Too short, too tall, too skinny, too fat, you get the idea. Did you ever stop to think that the person of your dreams just might be that 5'3 one standing in line at the coffee shop that you had a great conversation with? Lighten up on the type thing. You may be passing by your dream partner because of that. And then there's I prefer blondes. Come on now.
2. You have a hate shield around you.
Not literally, but you are putting out so much negative energy that people around you stay away. You have been burned a thousand times in the past and a thousand ways until next Tuesday and you really just don't trust anyone any more. What's a person to do but to repel other people? But wait. We don't want to keep them away, we are trying to attract someone, right? Let your guard down a bit. It's ok.
3. You're just like the rest.
No need to compare all your former lovers with anyone new you are going to meet. What's the point in that anyway? People are people and we are all different with some very good qualities. If you are too quick to judge or look for similarities, you may be missing out on a really super good person. Give someone a chance to show you who they are, not show you that they might be like your last partner.
4. You aren't happy in your own skin.
And people can smell this a mile away. No one wants to date someone who is miserable. Who in their right mind would? You first need to seek some self love before you start looking for or attracting love from others. If you don't, you will attract the wrong ones, and we all know what that is like, and you'll end up single again in no time. Discover self worth and love first and then watch what happens.
5. Your first date sucked …
Because you acted like a jerk and asked dumb questions or made your date feel like they were being interrogated. Learn how to lighten up and have fun. Dating shouldn't be akin to being on trial. You should be able to hang out, chill out, get to know the person a little bit and then take it from there. See where it goes, if anywhere, but for goodness sakes, they aren't criminals.
6. You won't budge.
You like your routine, you like your things, you like your life and even though you do want to spend your life with someone else, you aren't willing to compromise anything to fit someone in. They will have to accept you and your life exactly the way it is and if they want to be part of your life they will have to compromise and sacrifice. Do you see the problem there? You both have to compromise. Not just one person. A little bending a little give and take. You might surprise yourself and actually like some of the new changes happening in your life.
No matter what your age, being on the dating scene can either be a night mare or it can be loads of fun. Depending on your attitude of course. Be open. Have fun. Make new friends. Who knows, in all that, you may meet the person of your dreams.
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