Being conscious
The quickest route to baldness is to start a blog. There have been many things that have frustrated me along the way of starting this blog but none more so than last night.
My site was totally dead, 'E's not pinin'! 'E's passed on! This blog is no more! He has ceased to be! 'E's expired and gone to meet 'is maker! 'E's a stiff! Bereft of life, 'e rests in peace!. There was not a thing I could do. Firstly I checked the theme for wordpress
, everything was okay there. Next I checked some files I had uploaded, Google's my sitemap file, I deleted it and other verify used to verify I had access to my root server. Nothing at all. This went on for two hours.
I wrote a message on wordpress, they're always very helpful over there and they pointed me to another file. I wrote to my host provider heartinternet who were extremely quick in reply and sussed that the problem lay with my index.php which had either been re-written or a wrong one being uploaded by me or somebody else.
When I get problems with computer things that I know nothing about I get really frustrated and become really annoyed and it is crazy to do this. I was like this for about an hour and I had promised myself I would spend time with my wife tonight as I am becoming a computer freak just now, this will hopefully die down when the blog is really up and running, just now it's only starting to crawl.
I stopped after an hour, made a cup of tea for me and my wife and sat down with her as I had promised myself, albeit an hour and a half later than planned.
Had I not made a conscious effort to stop and think about how I was acting and to take time away from the situation I would have stayed up half the night trying to fix it. Being conscious of being conscious is something I am practicing a lot just now and it has got me out of a lot of trouble or potential trouble.
In my job as a support worker I meet different characters every day from different backgrounds and I have to stop and think about their situation. I can't force my beliefs on them. Just because I choose not to drink or take drugs or not get a job doesn't mean to say that I should force my values onto someone else. When I first started I had to bite my tongue and stop myself saying "˜For Christ's sake look at yourself, have a bloody word with yourself'. It's hard holding back, but I am so glad I did. Due to me being conscious of being conscious I have started to relate to people in a different way. Oh I still get my point across, but only when needed and in appropriate situations.
When you find yourself getting frustrated, panicky, anxious stop and ask yourself questions about the situation. The best question to ask is "˜what is the worst that can happen?' when you figure out the worst that can happen in a situation you are stopping to think and you are seeing there the situation you are in is not as bad as it could be.
This post was meant to be about me pulling my hair out last night but turned into a quick post about consciousness, apologies for the twist there.
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